"Do ya wanna strip search me?"

"Do you wanna' strip search me?"
 by Dick Mauer

Kent Lundgren told the story recently of a screwball Canadian he encountered reminded me of a Canadian character that Ned Cold and I encountered in the Greyhound bus depot, Buffalo New York in the late 80s. 

It seems like it was around the start of the AIDS epidemic that was then sweeping the country. This young guy had a one way ticket to NYC and was off to seek fame and fortune in the U.S. . First he told us that he had invented a homosexual device that allowed male lovers to safely trade favors. It consisted of an oral condom, made of an clear elastic/rubber fiber that covered one's entire face. He was taking it to NYC to introduce and patent to save the gay community from AIDS then ravishing them. Next he started opening and removing his pants. "What're you doing?" we ask. "Well" he says, "You're gonna' want to strip search me aren't you"? "No, keep your pants on and put your suitcase on the table". We open it and find about 500 sealed hypodermic needles. "What are you gonna' do with these?" "I am going to start a needle exchange in NYC to help stop AIDS" (That was a relatively new idea back then) With that he started opening his pants again saying, "well, now you're gonna' want to strip search me for sure,  aint'cha"? We finished the I-213 and V/R'd him (unsearched) back to Canada, telling him to go save the gays in Toronto.